Threats

Last night I had a dream that my ex was harassing me. He kept coming over to my house and asking me what was new with me. I had my reasons for not wanting to tell him much about my personal life so I just told him the names of some people that I work with. Then he kept pressing me about what else I was up to so I was like "I went to the supermarket today." And he interrupted me and said "Pfft, groceries. I'm going to be a doctor!" 

I don't know. 

So some time passed and he sent me a letter threatening my coworkers if I didn't go to the supermarket and return the groceries. So I immediately went back to the store and was racing through the aisles with my grocery cart (which I guess I hadn't bothered unloading?). I was barreling people over and at one point I overheard a woman on her cell phone saying, "There's a crazy woman running people down at the grocery store. You'll know when you see her. She has blonde hair and is wearing black leather boots."

I looked down and saw that I was wearing brown leather sandals, but I somehow knew she was referring to me. So I slowed down and tried to act natural. I went down a long, isolated hallway to get to the customer service desk and saw that there were three cops following me. And one of them put a gun up to my back and said, "Just keep walking."

So I was scared out of my mind, but I did as I was told. And we got into this empty room, and the two other officers said to the one who had the gun on me, "You got this?" And he nodded at them to go and that he'd "handle it."

When they were gone, he said, "Back up and lean against the stairs like I'm threatening you. But it's going to be okay, I've seen this happen way too many times." 

Then he started comforting me about hazardous relationships and how I shouldn't have to put up with people pushing me around and threatening me. It was in the middle of this speech that a burlesque show came in the room. For the record, it wasn't a risqué burlesque group...they just had some fabulous costumes.

I noticed there were several people I knew coming in, and I really didn't want them to see me, so the cop helped me duck behind a wall. They were about to start their routine when I woke up.

College Schedule

I had a dream I was going back to college for my final year. Even though I graduated six years ago, I still have college dreams all the time. Usually I'm late for an exam for a class I forgot to attend all year. But not this time.

I picked up my class schedule and I was really excited because I had four classes:

3:00 p.m. English

5:00 p.m. Characters Depicted in Watership Down (One of my favorite books, so a class in which all we do is discuss bunnies sounds fantastic to me).

7:00 p.m. I don't remember what was slotted here, but it was something fun, like canoeing or scrapbooking.

8:00 p.m. Evening Walks. Seriously! A class where you take walks around campus!

I was a little bummed that my classes started so late, because I prefer getting school and work out of the way early. But I mean, take a look at that schedule....not all that stressful. So I didn't mind too much. :)

Polar Bears & a Dishwashing Mistake

I had a dream last night that I was still working in the AmeriCorps*VISTA program (which I did a year of service for about six years ago). I know I had all my old job responsibilities, because at one point I was gathering all my supplies to train a group of people. 

So my job was basically the same, except I had to occasionally go into the Alaskan wilderness to check on polar bears. I had all this gear I had to put on, including a huge orange jacket so the polar bears would see me coming and not get spooked. Note: The polar bears were extremely dangerous. Like, this was serious business. 

I remember trekking into the void a couple of times (and had a few close calls). Then the dream kind of dissolved and I was in this restaurant kitchen and for some reason I had put all my Harry Potter books in the dishwasher. I remember taking them out one by one and the covers were completely destroyed and half the book was ripped out. I was devastated. And I looked over at the chef at one point and said "I should have taken the covers off first." 

I don't think that would have made the condition of the books any less destroyed, but it made sense at the time.

Nightmare

Last night I had a nightmare. And it was awful.

I was at work, though the building I was in looked nothing like the building I actually work in. It was more like City Hall from Parks and Recreation, because it had a courtyard. 

It was the end of the day and I was the last person in the office, but for some reason I stayed for a while, just looking around. I guess I felt a little uneasy. I looked across the courtyard and saw a closet door open very slowly, and a clown walked out and looked around. I guess I should mention -- clowns tend to terrify me. Especially if they are out of place (i.e. not at a birthday party or circus). 

I remember I could barely breathe, but I summoned my courage and screamed at the clown to "GET THE F#%! OUT OF HERE." The clown looked my way and honestly looked just as scared as I felt, and he ran away.

So I took a few deep breaths, then walked around the hallways just trying to calm down. After a few minutes I glanced across the courtyard again and the clown was peering at me from around a bookshelf or something with a really creepy grin. 

I started screaming and I woke up with my heart pounding. 

Dolphins

This girl I know is getting married next year. We're not close, but last night I had a dream that she was trying on wedding dresses while surrounded by her bridesmaids (all unfamiliar faces). I have no idea why I was there, but I was.

One of the bridesmaids told her that she should smoke two packs of cigarettes on the morning of the wedding. "It's terrible for you, but you'll look amazing!"

This doesn't make sense, because as far as I know this girl doesn't smoke. Also, I am vehemently anti-smoking.

I started getting stressed out at this point, and I remember thinking that the perfect thing to calm me down would be to swim with dolphins. Fortunately, my parents had just installed an indoor heated swimming pool, complete with dolphins!

It was awesome. I actually swam with dolphins on my honeymoon in Mexico about four years ago, so in my dream I was a pro at interacting with them. I held on to their fins and they pulled me all around, then I'd float on my stomach and they'd push me into the air. I was having a blasty-blast.

I'm not sure how long the dream lasted, but it felt really long, so it was nice.

Although it did make it that much harder when my alarm went off at 6:00.